Open Marriages

Just what exactly is the difference between an open marriage and swinging? At first it does appear on the surface that they represent the same thing; but delve deeper into the intricacies of both options and you will find that there are indeed distinctions with them which make a world of a difference to those involved.

In regards to the open marriage, it basically involves the married couple agreeing that they can be with other people in a sexual sense away from the marital bed. This takes away the idea of people having an affair and cheating on one another. They believe that their love and bond is strong enough and will not be damaged by either partner spending time with someone else.  They agree to them being allowed to have a relationship outside their marriage, but the other partner simply does not want to be included.

Swinging is different in that it generally involves two couples who swap partners for sex with it normally being in the presence of each other. This can also take the form of going to certain clubs where this takes place and there is no sense of building any kind of actual relationship other than it just being a way for them to have sex with others without there being any kind of emotions or feelings attached. It has to be said that an open marriage is often seen by many people as being a genre of swinging it’s just that the rules are slightly different as to what is allowed and the amount of time that they will spend with another person. In the open marriage, the person may go for dinner, go for walks or anything else like a normal relationship and up to including sexual involvement whereas swinging is purely sexual and virtually nothing else.

It is perhaps safe to say that neither option is classified as cheating as in most cases cheating requires a degree of trust to have been damaged whereas with both of these approaches everybody involved knows what is happening and indeed with whom. It is, therefore, important that there is complete honesty at all times for either option to really work and there has to be an understanding at all times that there is always a chance that something could go wrong and problems may indeed occur in the marriage or relationship. This is a chance that people are willing to take and any potential discomfort about what is going on must be discussed immediately and both people are in agreement about whatever is going on.

Those are the key differences between an open marriage and a couple who are swingers. The one thing that does come across is a clear understanding and a great degree of trust between the couple in order for either of these things to occur. If either interest you, then do make sure you talk it over with your partner and really look into it as much as possible because even though it undoubtedly works for some it can often lead to all kinds of problems for others.

“Freedom of the Seas” Lifestyle Cruise Review

After two years and much anticipation, the biggest couples only lifestyle cruise to date finally concluded on 11/18/2012. Royal Caribbean played host to 1,800+ couples, many of whom descended upon the Orlando Airport Marriott Hotel for the smashing precruise party Saturday night and then on to Port Canaveral Sunday morning for embarkation and departure to St. Thomas, St Marten and Coco Cay.

There were volumes of naked couples partying on the pool decks, the dungeon, the ‘hall pass’ room and the 7,000 sq.ft. well decorated “play” room; as well as the many private parties that went on in cabins and suites. The ship itself was outstanding, with more “swinger” and regular entertainment than one could possibly cover during a one week adventure. The daily pool parties rocked to the tunes of house DJs Moe Green and Mark Maze. The Karaoke bar was packed every night as was the Crypt Night Club. The theater shows were awesome with comedy acts like Tracy, the “Dominatrix of Ditties” who had side splitting jokes about “life as a swinger”. They covered the skating rink with ice each night to create a monster size disco dance floor that fit more than 500 people who danced the night away. Food and drinks were nonstop and the many restaurants, specialty food shops and snack bars served with lightning speed.

Thousands of guests came from all over the world to take part in this lifestyle party at sea; there was no shortage of variations in people’s personal preferences.  There were all out “full swap” swingers, soft swappers, girl/girl players, dungeon goers, fetish folks, nudists, voyeurs, curiosity seekers and just plain old vanilla couples that love being around the openness of the lifestyle community.

Visit SLS/Topless Travel or call  at 877-90-SWING for upcoming cruise schedules.   These lifestyle cruises just keep getting better each time and always sell out far in advance. If you’d like to experience one of these wild parties at sea, Visit SLS/Topless Travel or please call  at 877-90-SWING, they are the largest seller of cabins on these ships and their attention to detail and service to their clients is impeccable.

The Cuckold

Couples Question - The Cuckold Dear LifeStyle Counselor,

My wife and I have had a fetish for quite some time and we feel weird about our fetish. We both want to be cuckolded by an alpha male, how normal is this?

Signed The Cuckold

 

Dear Cuckold,

What you are explaining is nothing new, nor is it abnormal; several people are now embracing the cuckold concept within the lifestyle. The lifestyle has many fetishes, over the past few years the cuckold fetish has escalated and many couples are embracing this type of play. Couples on swinger websites are looking for partners to swap, but do you ever see couples looking for single men? The couples that look for single men are interested in a man to have sex with the wife while the husband joins or watches. Some are bisexual and looking for play; some others, believe it or not, advertise that they are looking to be cuckolded. Remember everyone has their own fetish and it is best to embrace it, as long as no one gets hurt and it is perfectly safe.

Sincerely,
LC

Welcome to the Wonderful World of the Swinging LifeStyle

By Little Allen General Manager of Trapeze

Welcome to the Wonderful World of the Swinging LifestyleSo you’ve finally decided to take the plunge! You have thought about swinging for weeks, months, maybe even years. You have fantasized about being with someone other than your significant other… and now, “The moment of truth has at last arrived.” Entering a swingers club like Trapeze is one of the most exciting experiences you can have as a couple.

Here are some helpful pointers that hopefully will assist a new couple to successfully embark on their maiden journey into swinging.

First and foremost good communication skills are a must between couples. Both partners must be able to communicate to one another their wants, needs and desires as it relates to swinging.  Setting boundaries is a must in order to eliminate problems that might arise between the new couple. Know your partner… remember, you guys are in this together to explore and enjoy. Take it slow and abide by the rules you have set for each other.

How you handle situations is key to your enjoyment in the swinging lifestyle. There may be occasions where you might meet up with another couple and for whatever reason, the chemistry just isn’t there. It is important to be able to get out of the situation gracefully without offending the other couple. One good piece of advice is to have code words such as, “Honey, did you remember to call the baby sitter”? Come up with creative words or phrases that alert your partner that you are not comfortable in that particular situation.

Two words that will wreak havoc in your relationship are “Jealousy & Love”. These are two emotions that you definitely want to avoid. Falling in love with someone other than your significant other or becoming jealous of the relationship your partner has created with someone else can be hazardous to your success in the Alternative Lifestyle. That is why it is so important for good communication to take place prior to encounters and after. Share with your partner the positive and the negative along with things that you might want to try in the future. Experimentation can be fun because it can enhance pleasurable experiences between both of you as well as others.

It is also important to know the rules of the club or venue that you visit. Of course the most important rule of any swingers club is “No Means No”. It is certainly not appropriate to think that you could go up to anyone and touch them without permission just as you would not want anyone to be aggressive with you or your partner without your consent. Go with the flow. Relax and enjoy!

Perhaps being amongst open minded people in an uninhibited setting such as a swingers club is the biggest social change you may encounter in your lives. The joy of expressing yourselves both verbally and physically with like minded people is what makes the alternative Lifestyle so fascinating and exciting. Remember, stick to the rules you both establish and stay the course.

Happy Swinging!

Get in Shape in a Sexy Way

Swingers View - Get in Shape in a Sexy Way

By Mrs. Webmaster  / SwingLifestyle.com

Participation in any fitness regimen should improve your physical appearance, your muscle strength, your general health, and your potential longevity.

Pole dancing for fitness is a sport that is based on the equipment and moves developed by dancers in strip clubs and acrobats in circuses. In recent years it has become much more than just adult entertainment; pole dance for fitness has exploded onto the scene of alternative fitness! Many women that participate in this sport neither intended nor desire to work in the sex industry.

Pole dancing will make you firm, toned and you will see results much faster than with a traditional weight/resistance program and many other types of traditional workouts.

One of the most enticing factors in pole dancing for fitness is that although one will see quite a lot of fit strong bodies among pole dancers, those who are seriously into the sport tend to develop lithe, willowy, toned, and flexible physiques that are more “cut”, toned and less massively built. This is because from the start, pole dancers throw their body weight up, down, and around while holding
on with their ankles, backs of knees and often even one handed. The weight that they are throwing around is further unbalanced by momentum, torque and spin which works the muscles completely and throughout their range of motion in order to develop the condition of the muscles or limbs as a whole rather than concentrating on lifting dumb weight in a specific way to affect certain muscles and/or muscle groups. Pole dancing is also a great cardio workout and therefore benefits your weight management goals while keeping the heart and lungs healthy.

The following is a list of the 5 major general benefits to participating in this fun and empowering activity:
- Improves physical strength throughout your body in both your core and skeletal muscles.
- Can build firm and toned muscles in a fairly short period of time. It will not take long before you begin to see results. The best part is that this firming and toning of the muscles focuses on those “problem areas” for women.
- Improved balance and agility as well as increased flexibility and core strength.
- Pole dancing is a physically challenging activity which will use every muscle and muscle group in your body while intensively targeting specific muscles throughout their range of motion; this will build properly proportioned lean muscle and allow you to bare your weight on the pole for longer and longer periods of time.
- All of the tricks, spins and holds are versatile and can be adapted to any person regardless of height or body type. There are moves and tricks for any fitness level and ability and as your strength and skills develop so will the range of tricks and elaborations that can be added to your repertoire.

Swingers Views - Get in Shape in a Sexy Way Another of the intriguing things about pole dance for fitness which attracts so many women is the numerous ways and various places that this sport can be pursued.

There are a wealth of videos on video sharing websites showing that women have installed poles in their entryways, in front of their TV, in the living room or den, in the corners of bed rooms, dining rooms, in their kitchens, their garage, in a storage locker and even outside on the porch .You can install a pole on tile floors, carpeting, Pergo, hardwood floors, concrete, stages, plywood, tile or any other type of floor covering commonly found in the home.

As with any sport or strenuous physical activity, it is recommended that you either receive formal training by enrolling in a class at a local studio or e-class online. You can even learn via a one on one session with another dancer. It is important that when you start you allow someone to guide you through the basics of pole dancing so that you learn the tricks of creating momentum to spin up or down the pole in various positions while using your body weight as a counterbalance and the pole as your fulcrum. After you have learned the basics it is completely up to you how you want to continue to learn but there are numerous methods, venues and places where you can get instruction on pole fitness. You can also use videos or books such as the Pole Dancing for Dummies book.

In the end you will find yourself loving the way that pole dancing strengthens and shapes your body. If you are trying to lose weight or aiming for better muscle tone and body conditioning, this one piece of fitness equipment may be the solution that you are looking for. There is no need to purchase any other equipment and if you install a removable pole at home, once you have learned the routines you can surprise your boyfriend or significant other. Challenge yourself; there are numerous ways to keep the activity new and fresh so that you don’t grow bored with your fitness regimen. As your confidence and sense of innate femininity grow, your body will melt away the layers of fat in all of the zones and places that women normally refer to as “problem areas”. Your new toned, fit, and strong appearance will amaze your friends and significant other, but most importantly it will impress you!

The most important thing to remember about pole dancing is to loosen up and have fun!

Restaurant Date

Couples Questions - Restaurant DateDear Lifestyle Counselor,

When being seated at the restaurant, should a man walk ahead of or behind the women? When is the appropriate time to lead versus follow?
Signed Restaurant date

 

Dear Restaurant Date,

It is common courtesy to walk in front of her, so when you arrive at the table, you may extend her chair as a caring act. Now, if you and your wife are on a date with another couple, again you may walk with the other gentleman and allow the wives to follow behind together, and as a kind gesture pull their chairs out for them.

Sincerely,
LC

ISD 2013 – Vegas Exchange

International Swingers Day, a celebration for swingers, honors the growing sexual revolution among the alternative lifestyle community. It continues to evolve and is still going strong and gets better every year. ISD started back in 2004 as just a lifestyle holiday where clubs all over the globe would host swinger parties in celebration of the lifestyle. In addition to the swinger parties, they hold a swinger’s convention full of erotic swinger’s parties, adult workshops, excursions and a way for industry leaders to connect and discuss advancing the lifestyle.

ISD - 2012ISD 2012 was held at Caliente Caribe in the beautiful island of the Dominican Republic. All the big names of the lifestyle showed up, which included swing club owners, swinger’s websites owners and adult travel agencies. Many couples from around the world also flew in to be a part of the 1st annual ISD swinger’s convention. In addition to exotic nightly themed events, there were live entertainment by Mark Maze, the Dominatrix of Ditties and comedian Traci Kanaan. There was a live broadcast from FoXXXy Forum LifeStyle Talk, and a bunch of adult workshops such as BDSM 101, Swinging 101, Romancing the Newbies and a whole lot more. To top it all off was a carnival filled with great costumes, fire breathers and pageantry. The best part about ISD at Caliente Caribe was their on premise swing club. The club was full of energy with pole dancers, a full bar, outside hot tubs and playrooms. ISD certainly lived up to its expectations and ISD 2013 promises to be even better. View images of ISD 2012.

ISD 2013 - Vegas Exchange ISD 2013 the convention will be held at the Palms Casino Resort from August 7 – 11, 2013 and it is called Vegas Exchange. Vegas Exchange is the ultimate lifestyle vacation and set to be the lifestyle event of the decade. They are picking up where LifeStyles left off. LifeStyle convention ran for 34 years and now the torch has been passed to Vegas Exchange to continue big Vegas Conventions for the alternative lifestyle community. Over 3000 swingers will invade the Palms Casino Resort, one of the most prestigious and luxurious hotels in Vegas. Celebrity guest such as Larry Flynn and Nina Hartly are just a few of the star studded weekend. In addition, there are sexy nightly themed events, live entertainment, great excursions, luxurious playrooms and that is just a tip of the iceberg. This is a lifestyle convention you don’t want to miss!! Visit the Vegas Exchange for more details…..

Keeping Things Fair

From the book “The Swingers Manual”Keeping Things Fair

It is important to note that while at times you may feel comfortable receiving more than you are ready to give, you should not do so. By allowing someone else to do something to you, that you are not ready to return, you may mislead them into thinking that you are ready for more. Think of it as being fair to everyone. You really wouldn’t want someone to say to you “well, you can do this to me but I’m not going to reciprocate,” so why would you do that to them? Try to avoid setting up expectations that you can’t deliver on.

Let’s look at this example. Jack & Diane’s interest in swinging stems from their desire for her to live out her bisexual fantasies. Diane has no interest in touching or being touched by another man, however Jack is open to whatever Diane will allow. They meet up with

Sara & Stan who are open to pretty much anything, including full swap, but agree to give Jack & Diane a try. Over the next few months they get together on several occasions during which Jack is allowed to touch and fondle both women, but Stan is only allowed to touch his own wife. During one of their play sessions Sara gives Jack a blowjob.  Seeing this leaves Stan feeling rather left out. If Jack can get a blowjob from Sara, why can’t Stan even touch Diane? Eventually Sara & Stan call it quits with Jack & Diane because Stan can no longer accept the double standard he is being forced to live with. By allowing Sara to give him a blowjob, Jack & Diane mislead Stan and Sara to believe that they were both ready for more. Even though Jack and Diane are both ok with what happened, they would have been better to restrict the play to girls only until or unless Diane was also willing to give the same interaction to another guy that she was ok with Jack receiving. It would also have behooved Stan to speak up earlier and state his displeasure with the direction things were taking. Perhaps, had he done so, things might have changed to better everyone’s enjoyment instead of having to come to a complete halt.

Keep in mind that just as you have the option to set your own boundaries, other couples have the option to not play with you because your boundaries are too restrictive for them. While some couples will be willing to play with you regardless of your boundaries and will be happy to stay within your boundaries they may not be happy to continue to do so for very long, just as we saw with Stan and Sara.

________________

As the owner and hostess of the Swingers Board, I’ve spent the last 12 years giving and reading advice to swingers, both new and old. There are some truths that ring over and over again, and some issues that vary so much that only you will ever know the right answer for you.

“The Swinger Manual” is about helping you determine your answers, and helping to clarify some of the questions you already have and will have along the way.

Order your copy today at www.swingermanual.com

Letters from our Readers

Hello LifeStyleMagazine,

We have been subscribers since your first issue of LifeStyle Magazine in 2004. We were delighted to receive the Winter and Spring 2012 issues and we are happy to see the magazine for and by swingers continue to publish.

To our knowledge, this magazine is the only magazine in North America that caters to swinger Lifestyle couples like us. We have been swinging as a couple for quite some time and we truly enjoy reading the articles on swinging that included The History of Swinging, Top Ten Reasons to be a Swinger, Soft Swinging, Swinging Etiquette and other topics that benefit newbie couples as well as seasoned swingers that partake in sexual activities up to and including intercourse with the mate of another couple for full swap and total enjoyment of all sexual pleasures.

We have been reading every issue of the magazine from cover to cover. After we are done reading we put the magazine on the coffee table or another visible spot in our home for when we socialize with other couples. We invariably get the couples leafing through the magazine and asking questions related to swinging. We let the couple borrow the issue for the husband’s/wife’s reading pleasure in the privacy of their bedroom. The magazine is a great help in dispelling prevalent misconceptions about couples swinging, socializing and swapping mates for sexual pleasures that may include intercourse with each others mate. Your magazine helps couples who are ambivalent about swinging take the leap and join the swing community.

Keep up the good work.

Sahaja Couple

Lifestyle Cruise – Jewel of the Seas

Swingers Lifestyle Travel - Lifestyle Cruise For those who have never been on a swinger cruise, you are letting the best things in life pass you by. The Jewel of The Seas is offering a Swinger Cruise January 28 – Feb 2nd. 2013.

There will be themed nights, parties, and events but what you need to understand is that when you board you will be given an itinerary of the exciting on board events. On this ship there is practically everything you could ask for in the way of fantasy, things to do or people to do. For those that have attended regular cruises before, a swinger cruise is not much different in terms of what to expect. Sure there is clothing optional areas, but the amenities and entertainment are always part of the agenda. The price of a cruise includes your cabin, all of the shows and use of all of the facilities; all meals and snacks all day and night. On larger ships, there are places where you can go for breakfast, lunch, dinner and midnight buffets plus the food is free. There is generally a room service menu that you can order from 24/7 and that food is free (you should tip the delivery person a couple dollars) but does not include all drinks.  The ships provide coffee, tea, milk, juices, and drinks like lemonade and punch for free. BUT, you must pay for soft drinks (usually about $1.50) and all alcoholic beverages including beer and wine.

Swingers Lifestyle Travel - Lifestyle CruiseThere are places on ships to play cards and board games; and the cards and games are provided. If you want to just sit and read, there’s a library where you can bring your books or select one from the shelf. Ships have internet cafes and some offer WIFI if you prefer to use your computer in your cabin (some ships offer notebooks for rent).  Some people worry about getting sea sick, but the ships being used these days have automated stabilizers which minimize the rocking. The larger ships cut through the water so easy that you don’t even feel like you are moving. When there is bad weather the cruise lines will steer around and away from it. Also, the ships generally move overnight and dock in the mornings so you don’t feel much movement. Consequently, your chances of getting sea sick are minimal. There is generally less motion than on an airplane. If you do get sick, all ships have a doctor and they will dispense sea sick medicines. If you are prone to motion sickness, just get pills or a patch from your own doctor before you go, or go to a boating store and get a sea sickness bracelet. My brother gets sea sick but has never become sick on any cruise, however better to be safe than sorry.

The dress code on ship is casual all day and clothing optional depending on location. So take swim wear, shorts, sandals, beach shoes, your snorkel equipment if you have it, sun glasses and sun screen, lotions, a cap or big hat for the sun, a book if you are a reader, your music player, sneakers and clothes to workout in if you like to use the gym, your camera, and other personal toiletries. Most 7-day cruises have two formal nights when you can wear your best stuff and get pictures taken, and maybe meet the ship’s Captain. Same applies here. The formal nights are REQUESTED not required attire. But some people do dress up in a tux for men and a long dress (any color) for women. Some men just wear a suit and tie and some women wear a nice dress but not a gown.  You should pack formal, informal and any toys you may want to have fun with on board the ship.  A free-form sculpture suspended above the dance floor is a focal point of the Centrum. This eye-catching sculpture made of aluminum, crystal and stainless steel is entitled “Northern Lights” and is aptly named. A lighted stairway, leading to deck 5, separates the dance floor and bar from the Guest Relations. Aft (towards the rear) of the Centrum, on deck 4, is the main floor of the stately 2 story Tides Dining Room. Windows along both sides of the dining room, silk draped pillars, high ceilings, an expansive staircase and cascading waterfall all combine to make the area airy, yet elegant. Along the back wall of the dining room hangs a stunning 2 story mosaic of glass, brass and copper.