10 Ways To Surprise Your Lover

By Dr. Jess (Dr. Jessica O’Reilly) from Sex with Dr. Jess

Keeping the flames of passion and lust burning in a long-term relationship is a challenge for the best of us, so check out these techniques to reignite the spark and enjoy a lifetime of steamy sex.

10 Ways To Surprise Your Lover

For Her

1.  Seduce Her With Your Words

Sex begins (and ends) in the brain, so get into her head with some saucy compliments that highlight all five senses of your desire. Save the “Pretty dress!” and “You look nice!” for your mom and offer sensual compliments that highlight your animalistic attraction to her:

You smell so sweet.
You taste like heaven.
I love the sound of your laugh.
You look smokin’ hot. I want to tear your clothes off right
here, right now!
I crave the feeling of your soft skin against mine.


2.  S-L-O-W Sex

A quickie in the broom closet makes for a great story, but sometimes slowing down can work wonders for your sex life. The next time you initiate sex, try to avoid touching her most sensitive (and predictable) spots for at least ten minutes.  Trace the tips of your fingers, the underside of your tongue and your gentle breath over her entire body avoiding her breasts and the space between her thighs. You’ll leave her body craving more of what you’ve got to offer!

3.  New Positions

If you want to pique her interest, you have to keep her guessing and change things up once in a while. Forget your tried and true go-to moves and experiment with new positions designed for her pleasure. Many women orgasm from grinding and rubbing on the outside – not from thrusting in and out. Try throwing her on her stomach and letting her grind against a vibrating toy as you thrust from behind or try the Happy Sardines position:

You lie on your back and she lies on top of you also on her back.
You slide between her legs and she squeezes her thighs together to create extra friction and rubbing.
As you slide in and out, she squeezes her PC muscles and you reach around to cup the top of her vulva and rub in rhythm with her pelvic movements.

10 Ways To Surprise Your Lover


4.  Plan a Sex-Vacation

Sightseeing, foodie tours and family visits may make for great Facebook albums, but they’re not always good for your sex life. Take advantage of vacation sex by setting aside a few days with no fixed plans. Head to your local sex store and pick out some indulgent outfits, videos and toys before locking yourself in the hotel room to explore your wildest fantasies.

5.  Lingerie in the Shower

The old poke-her-from-behind technique may work after an evening of romance, but if you get creative in your seduction techniques, you’re sure to increase your batting average. Slip into the bathroom while she is in the shower and hang some new lingerie on the door with a handwritten note: Can’t wait to see your beautiful body in this! And since (almost) no woman can resist the temptation of shoes, add a new pair to her collection if you’re feeling particularly generous.


For Him

6.  Pearl Necklace

No time to go lingerie shopping between professional and personal commitments?  No problem! Lower the lights and surprise him in the bedroom wearing nothing but a pair of heels and a long strand of pearls.  Sit on his lap and remove your pearls before covering them in your favorite lube. Sensually wrap them around his shaft, drape them beneath his balls and suck them into your mouth as you seamlessly integrate jewelry into your oral sex repertoire.

Bonus: slide your lubed-up pearls inside of you and let him gently pull them out before using them as a blow job prop.


10 Ways To Surprise Your Lover7. Stroke His Ego

Get a little raunchy in bed by brushing up on your dirty talk.  Focus on sexy compliments that stroke his second most sensitive body part: his ego.

You’re the best I’ve ever had.
You’re so good. I’d pay for this!
Your so big that it hurts.
I’m coming!
I’ve been thinking about your cock all day long.
Other women must crave your big, fat cock.

8.  Take it Outside!

Sex in the bedroom may be warm and comfy, but small changes in location can pack a big impact and generate memories that will last a lifetime. Create a monthly sex challenge and show some love to every room in your house including the laundry room and the garage. Sitting atop the dryer adds vibrations to your sex life and getting naked in the car can be a huge turn-on as your mind wanders back to your younger years…

9.  Morning Blow Job

Those three magic words can take your sex life to new heights and leave him dreaming of nothing but you, you, YOU!  Wake him up with some soft breath over his thighs and slowly work his member into your mouth to remind him just how lucky he is.

10.  Erotic Massage

Create an at home rub-n-tug complete with candles, massage oil and a ready and willing attendant who is eager to please. Blindfold him and offer a sensual massage with all the trimmings and remember to ask him for directions:

Rub his cock between your oiled-up breasts
Slide your slippery body over his most sensitive parts
Tease his erogenous zones with your breath
Use two hands to grip and stroke him from base to tip
Press your fingers into his perineum to stroke the inner bulb of his penis
Remove the blindfold as you finish him off with rhythmic strokes and a fluid twisting motion over his coronal ridge (the swollen part at the base of his head)

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